It's Candy Mountain, Sully!
by LadyAsfaloth
Summary: Nate and Elena drag Sully along on their next adventure, which turns out to be a little different than Sully had in mind. Parody of Charlie the Unicorn.


A/N: So, I actually wrote this over two years ago. Well, most of it. I found it buried in my documents on my laptop, and decided to add an ending and upload it. I know the writing's not the best, it's just meant to be some stupid humor using the plot of the YouTube video "Charlie The Unicorn". If this is actually liked enough, I'll probably add more chapters based off of the second and third of Charlie's adventures. Anyways, thanks for reading!

* * *

><p>It was a quiet, peaceful morning. The birds chirped, sun shone bleakly into Sully's room through the window as he lay in bed, snoring the day away. Apparently, two beings were destined to stop this from happening.<p>

"Hey Sully, Sully, wake up!"

"Yeah, you silly sleepyhead, wake up!"

"Gyah!" with a startle, Sully sat up straight in his bed, whipping his head around to see Nate standing next to one side of his bed, and Elena at the other. Both adults were peering down at the older man.

"How the heck did you two get in here?" he shouted at them, still not quite over his abrupt awakening.

"You gave me a key, remember?" Nate looked down innocently at him.

"What do you two need that's so important you need to barge in and wake me up at-" all three of them looked at the digital clock next to Sully's bed; the little numbers read 11:03. Both Elena and Nate looked back at Sully pointedly.

"Sully, we found a map to Candy Mountain!" Nate happily exclaimed.

"We're going to Candy Mountain, Sully, come with us!" Elena joined in his enthusiasm.

"Yeah, Sully, come with us!" Nate's face brightened at the thought. "It'll be an adventure! We're going on an adventure!"

Sully looked at the two adults like they were insane. "What are you, eight? There's no such thing as Candy Mountain, I'm going back to sleep." With that, he pulled the blankets up and put a pillow on top of his head, lying back down.

"No, Sully, you HAVE to come with us to Candy Mountain!" Nate, in protest, started bouncing on Sully's bed.

Elena joined in the jumping. "Yeah, Sully! Candy Mountain! It's a land of sweets and joy and joyness," for how long she rambled, Sully wasn't sure, he'd stopped listening.

"Would you two PLEASE stop bouncing on my bed?"

"Candy Mountain, Sully!" They both chanted, whilst bouncing still.

"Alright, fine, I'll go with you to this so called 'Candy Mountain'!" Sully grudgingly pulled himself out of bed to the sound of their cheering. He didn't have long, however, before the two were practically dragging him out of his house.

* * *

><p>"We all live in a yellow submarine!"<p>

"A yellow submarine!"

"A yellow submarine!"

"We all live in a yellow submarine!"

Three hours. Three hours, those two had been singing a song that made Sully cringe every time. And it's not like they were singing it well. Frankly, he was fed up.

"Guys!" Sully snapped, "Enough with the singing!"

The silence his outburst evoked was only temporary.

"In the jungle..."

"The mighty jungle…"

"The lion sleeps tonight!"

"Ugh!" Sully grunted in frustration and strode irritably ahead of the singing couple. His angry march was halted abruptly when he unexpectedly came face to face with a large, golden Buddha statue.

"Sully, this is our first stop!" Nate shouted, throwing his arms up with glee.

"It's the Buddha, Sully! A splendid Buddha!" Elena screeched, jumping up in down in excitement.

Nate joined in her jumping. "It's gonna guide our way to Candy Mountain!"

"C'mon," Sully sighed, "You guys don't really think Candy Mountain is real, do you?"

Both adults stood there, looking at Sully with disbelief. Nate let out a small whisper, "Shun the non believer!"

"Shuuuuuun!" Elena contributed.

Sully decided he should just learn to keep his mouth shut.

* * *

><p>"Are you guys done <em>yet<em>?" Sully asked his traveling companions, annoyed. Nate and Elena had been studying, conversing with, even climbing on the dang Buddha for over three hours. Sunset was approaching, and Sully wasn't sure he wanted to spend the night in this forest, wherever they were.

"Wait-" Nate eyed the Buddha critically, glancing back down at the journal in his hand. "There!" he triumphantly pointed to an intricate diagram in the little leather notebook. Try as he might, Sully couldn't make heads or tails of the drawing.

"It has shown us the way!" Elena cheered upon viewing the journal. The two adults sprinted off to a path on their right, leaving Sully just as lost feeling as he had been three hours ago.

When the older man had finally caught up to the two, they were waiting in the middle of a rickety, old wood and rope bridge spanning a wide chasm. Hunched over and winded, Sully nervously eyed the bridge. "Uh, guys, you're on a bridge."

"Oh, really? I hadn't noticed," Nate replied sarcastically.

"It's a magical bridge!" Elena cheered, "Of hope, and wonder!"

"And," Sully continued, "What happens when you touch things, Nate?"

Nate counted off his options on his fingers. "They either spontaneously combust, or collapse."

"Exactly!" Yet the two still didn't follow the older man's train of thought. "As in, maybe you guys shouldn't be on that bridge? It looks ready to break without any help from you two!"

"Oh, come on!" Nate urged. "We're already halfway across, and doing fine!"

Sully caved. "Oh, all right." He took a tentative step onto the bridge. And then another. Nothing happened. The two in the middle decided not to wait for the old geezer, instead making their way across ahead of him. But, of course, their luck didn't hold out very long.

Elena had made it safely onto the other side, with Nate trailing behind a few feet and Sully in the middle, when the bridge suddenly lurched with a strong breeze. Behind him, Sully heard the all too familiar sound of ropes snapping.

"Run!" he shouted, taking off as fast as he could as the bridge went down behind him. Nate reached the edge, turned around, and held his arm out just in time to catch the old man. With a little effort, Sully climbed up on to safe ground, and sighed.

"What," he panted, "did I tell you about that bridge?"

Nate, however, wasn't listening. He opened his journal and scratched a mark onto a page already full of tallies. "Another one for the collection," he announced, snapping his journal shut with a smile.

Elena was analyzing the sky. "Quick!" she shouted, "We've got to get to Candy Mountain before sundown!" She took off running down the path through the trees, Nate hot on her heels. Sully shook his head, but followed them anyways. There was no telling what trouble those two would get into next.

The trio rounded another bend in the trail, and the sight before his eyes caused Sully to stop dead. Looming in front of them, in a grassy meadow, was a literal mountain made out of candy. The peak reached high into the sky, too tall to spot the peak, while at the base loomed a cave. The words "Candy Mountain", formed of candy canes, spelled out above the cave entrance.

"Sully!" Nate came bounding up to him. "It's Candy Mountain, Sully!"

"Well, I be go to hell…" was all Sully could answer. There really was a Candy Mountain!

"Fill me with sweet, sugary goodness," Elena sang, plucking candy off of the base.

Nate tugged on the old man's elbow, almost dragging him forward. "Go into the Candy Mountain Cave, Sully!" he urged. He and Elena shoved Sully in before he could protest, and sealed the entrance.

"Uh, guys?" Sully called out, his voice echoing ominously in the darkness. "Guys?"

Suddenly, he felt a thunk on the back of his head, and then everything went black.

* * *

><p>"Ugh…" Sully moaned, opening his eyes. To his relief, he was back in his bed, safe in his apartment. "Man…What a strange dream…"<p>

"What dream, Sully?" Elena popped out from under his bed, eating a chocolate bar.

Nate appeared from underneath the other side of the bed, holding one of those giant, rainbow, swirly lollipops. "Yeah, Sully!" he cheered, "Tell us about your dream!"

Sully just groaned and pulled a pillow over his face.


End file.
